Just One Thing
Super vulnerable post. I’m calling this day, Suck It Up Sunday. 🙂
I’m sharing this to let you know that not everyday is positive, not every day is easy but this is what pulling myself out of negativity and depression looks like. A Life After Trauma is about being positive more than being negative but dealing with reality as it is.
On top of having to deal with major repairs to our RV (which is where we live full time) and the clean up of fine dust over everything in here including all the dishes, cabinets, floors, walls, ceilings, clothes and bedding, then several weekends working 12 – 15 hour days, I’m also dealing with what seems like an impossible situation with my son. He’s in a difficult situation that I cannot do anything about right now. I spent my first Thanksgiving not being able to contact him and not knowing where he is or how he’s doing. It sent me into a depression.
The depression sneaked up on me before I even realized it. It started out as “just being too tired” to do anything one day. The next day it was I’m just too tired to cook or clean. The next day I was just to tired to get out of bed. I was still functioning but the trips back to bed became longer and longer until now. I’ve been just lying around, in the bed, watching tv and watching things pile up. I couldn’t bring myself to care though. I’ve been stepping over stuff to just get back to the bed all week.
I can’t change a lot of things that are going on right now but I looked around today and decided, you know what?, I CAN pick up that bag. I CAN put some water in the sink to soak the dishes that have been there all week. I CAN wash one dish. I CAN put away one bag of groceries that are still sitting on the floor.
This day has been about doing one thing. Picking one thing and doing it. I’ve returned to the bed several times but I’ve gotten back up to do “one more thing” several times. Those things add up. I sat back down and I’m still looking at a mess but when I add up the list of “just one thing(s)” I got something accomplished.
I got the propane tank refilled. I washed up, not just the dirty dishes in the sink, but cleaned out the whole drawer full of silverware and cooking utensils that were covered in fine dust. I wrote out the checks to pay the bills that were due. I got the groceries up out of the floor and put away.
There is still a mess but it is one thing I CAN change. That I can do and by doing it, I will work my way out of the slump I’m in. One thing at a time. One step at a time.
Tomorrow will be a little better because I’ll get up and start with “just one thing”. Hang in there peeps. If you’re struggling too, try just one thing. <3